Mental Monday: The Mind, Part I

Bad! They said I was "bad." Really bad. As in horrible . . . awful, what the HELL?! One woman even said, "Suzanne, you got courage, because anyone else who swam as badly as you would have given up by now."

The Mind. Overcoming my fear was all in my mind, until my body began to shake and shiver uncontrollably in the middle of the pool. Nine feet of water over my head and all I could think about was "how was I going to stop my body from shaking like a broken washing machine." I couldn't. Someone had to come in the pool and help me!

page from handmade book "Breathe" by Suzanne Coley

This is my story. These are my actual diary entries of overcoming my fear of water. It took me 40 years, only to realize that I will never actually overcome it. I will learn to live with it.

Working on drawings after swimming class

Immediately after swimming classes, I would go directly to a cafe and work on my drawings and notes.

I wanted to record my emotions and activiites (such as Yoga, breathing exercises) 30 minutes before class and 30 minutes after class so that I could have a more accurate account of patterns, progress, and problems.

page from "Breathe" by Suzanne Coley

Each page had to dry 24 hours before I could paint or print the next layer.

I worked on the pages of the book every moment I had. They were layered like life. This is an image of the first layer of a few pages.

On the last day of class, I presented my book "Breathe" to my wonderful instructor!

Gold, textured, and heavy, "Breathe" was the most difficult book I've ever made.

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